Why do we care about these widows the way we do?
Life as a widow is often compounded by the cultural demands on these women after the deceased spouse. Cultural influence plays a key role in how these widows are treated as it also impacts their financial stability. Most of the widows in Africa, especially in Nigeria are often humiliated and blamed for the death of their spouse especially if the death of the spouse occurred at a young age. The woman is blamed for the death of the spouse even though it is very glaring that the spouse died from natural causes or medical reasons from complications of other diseases or acute illnesses.
The toil and pressure that accompany the death of a spouse on the widow range from community hatred and humiliation, and cultural norms that often leave the woman emotionally, psychologically traumatized. The widow becomes mentally and physically destabilized which often leads the women with undiagnosed depression, anxiety, PTSD, and other mental health issues. Sometimes in most cases after the spouse’s death, the woman is displaced from their marital homes with no financial help insight, or a bright outlook for her and the kids.
One of the reasons this writer is so passionate, compassionate, and sympathetic towards the plight of these widows because her best friend was a victim of the Nigerian society and culture that treats widows unfairly after the spouse’s death. The cultural impact that empowers the family to take over the deceased property played a key role in the early demise of this writer’s friend. The story is so traumatic that it still gives the goose pimples each time it is shared. After the death of the friend’s spouse from Leukemia, the family took over the spouse’s business and the home she was living in with her two children. She became homeless with the kids with no financial support or job to lean on as the deceased husband was her financial support while he was alive. The loss of the spouse which was already traumatic to her and the kids was complicated by psychological challenges, financial constraints as well as the burden of raising the kids alone. These and everything around her further complicated her health status as she became sad, depressed, worn out due to struggling to make ends meet for herself and the kids. The friend became chronically ill and died about 4 years ago. The irony of it all is that the kids no longer have their dad or their mom with them while their father’s family is enjoying the financial gains of their late father.
The quest and journey to help the impoverished widows for this writer started as a seed a long time ago and the seed sprouted when the best friend deceased 4 years ago. At passionate Fortress, we understand and empathize with every widow and what they are going through. We understand the daily challenges and hurdle they go through to provide food and education for their children, that is why we are asking for your support. We need your partnership to help us empower these women and their kids to help provide a sustainable future that will help foster their success. We can achieve so much more together with your help to make a difference.
Written by Tessy